in the middle.

Could I please be middle aged?

These are the facts that I learned from the Today Show about women in the middles:

You don't have to wash your hair as often.
Your skin is more clear and even.
You are smarter.

Here are my reasons why I think it'd be cool to be middle aged:

College loans will be gondy.
Lipstick doesn't look ridiculous on you.
Maybe by then I'll have cleaned my room.
Maybe I'll know how to go grocery shopping.
Maybe I'll be married.
Maybe I'll have a dog.
Maybe I'll like my hair.

That's a lot of maybe's that might not happen. Swell.

The word maybe used to mean a big fat no back in the day.
"Dad, can I go to Mr. B's house tonight?" I would ask eagerly.
"Maybe." he'd reply.

And I'd go stomping off to my room and slam my door because I was ticked.

I better go clean my room.

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